Couldn't bare to see my dad

The first weekend that I went out to my dad's I wanted to go, but I didn't. I wanted to be at home but I didn't not want to see my dad. I just kinda hoped that this whole thing out disappear. I remember just sitting in the car with my dad crying. I don't remember what he said, and some how I don't think that I mattered. I just wanted life to go back to normal. I didn't want to choose between my parents. I didn't want to. I felt bad for my dad because he was the one that got left. But I also wanted to be with my mom. I always wanted to be with her no matter what. She was my mom. When you get hurt who do you go to? Your mom.